The Flood

The Lord seen some sinning and it caused Him pain.
And He said, "Stand back, I'm going to make it rain!"
He said, "Hey, Brother Noah, I'll tell you what to do,
Go and build me a floating zoo,"

"and take some".......

"Green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees.
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born.
Don't you forget My unicorns."

Brother Noah seems to have forgotten this poor creature anyways. It looks like it even lost its horn in the process.

Back here

Well, after all the holiday fun we finally made it back home. Everybody was really happy about sleeping in their own beds and having their own routine back on track. Since we got back, I've had LOADS of blog subject ideas, but very little inspiration / time to write them up.

E started school last week and Z is due to begin this Sunday. We've been out a fair bit, had people over a few times and were generally busy with life. We went on a boat ride on the Nile, organised two braais, went to the Hash, to some Ethiopian night, visited the horse farm, went to see a flat with a real estate agent and today we are due to a school picnic. Life is certainly not dull.

I will try and get back into this blogging routine again. So watch this space, bigger and better things lie ahead!

Quick update (or something like that)

KRT-AMS: Ice tea, hot coffee and pee on my clothes, courtesy of my kids. Other than that, fine trip.

AMS: Lots of waiting around, tired kids, good playgrounds, lots of coffee, kids' nap room.

AMS-GVA: Nothing to report

GVA: Off to Ecublens, Bern, Morges and Vallorbe. Survived one week intensive field training. Met amazing people and made fantastic friends. Back to Ecublens and Lausanne. Spent afternoon with brother and SIL to be.

GVA-AMS: Met a Canadian rock musician living in Hawaii.

AMS: Coffee with above mentioned rock musician. Great conversation. Lots of waiting around. Massage. More waiting. Sushi. Shopping. Waiting.

AMS-YYC: Sat beside Hungarian guy from Szeged. Yay, I had a travel companion. Good fun. Good food. Good music.

YYC: Off to Sundre. Great to see the kids again. Cold weather. Running after V's passport. Visiting family. Kids love the cousins. Great fun.

And right now: need sleep. :)

Holidays ahead

We are going on holidays.

We will visit family and friends. We will see green grass and clear skies. We will taste rain and enjoy the cool wind. We will see cows and hear church bells. We will eat Swiss cheese and drink French wine. We will do fun stuff with the kids and spend time with loved ones.

We will spend 72 hours locked in a plane with two weary toddlers. We will be jetlagged by nine hours back and forth. We will get very little sleep going to bed late talking to family and getting up at silly o'clock with kids. We will freeze our butts off in 20 degrees colder than we're used to. We will only spend 10 days together all four of us because of various professional commitments.

Something tells me we will be more tired when we get back than when we left. But hey, that's what holidays are all about, no?

Small world

One of the good things about expat life is that I get to meet a lot of new people almost on a daily basis. They come from all kinds of places and backgrounds and usually they all have a very interesting story to tell. Some leave quickly. Some of them stay for a while and I get to know them better. Some become my friends. Some remain acquaintances. In any case, I am glad they passed through my life. Obviously the downside about this is that at some point we have to say goodbye.

But sometimes the world proves to be small and I come across the same people in totally different places. The Argentinian doctor who treated me for kidney stones in Liberia was the same who signed me off for maternity leave in Madagascar. The donor I discussed ploughs with in Luanda ended up offering me breakfast in Antananarivo.

And today I met up with a Hungarian girl I worked with in Angola. We only met briefly there, long enough to like each other but too short to really stay in touch over the years. I am so grateful she is here. Beside the fact that we have the potential of becoming very good friends, she also allows me to speak my mother tongue and this is something I've been missing a lot since we've been here.

See, the world is so small... :-)

Quite a Friday

Yesterday we went out to the horse farm for E's birthday brunch. Well, his birthday is only in another 10 days, but since Auntie R and Uncle L are leaving on holidays soon, this was the only date when we could come together. In the end there were only eight of us, kids included, because a friend of mine who was supposed to come with her two children got sick the night before. I prepared a ball cake complete with green grass made out of coconut. I am pretty useless with anything even remotely artistic but it turned out ok and it tasted good too.

It was an extremely windy day with dusty haboob coming from the South. We had a hard time hanging on to plates, glasses and table cloth. Nevertheless the waffles were delicious and the grass green, so we all had good fun. The kids went for a splash in the small pool, ran around and generally had a ball. Once back home, we tried to put them down to sleep which kind of worked, but not really, so they both ended up pretty tired after their (not) nap.

In the evening the neighbours organised a haggis special on our rooftop. According to Wiki, "haggis is a traditional Scottish dish. There are many recipes, most of which have in common the following ingredients: sheep's 'pluck' (heart, liver and lungs), minced with onion, oatmeal, suet, spices, and salt, mixed with stock, and traditionally boiled in the animal's stomach for approximately three hours." We also had beef filet, salad, broccoli and cheese, yorkshire pudding and apple / pineapple crumbles for dessert. It was a delicious meal with great company.

Getting my act together

I've been rather busy these days. Beside the obvious kids - husband - household stuff, I've also been doing quite a bit of reading and reflecting. I discovered a great Christian website and while I am still questioning some of their statements, I found answers that I've long been looking for. You'd think that after 15 years with the Adventists who analyze and dissect every Bible text and connect them to 15 others to make their point I would have seen it and known it all. Not so. I had to revise my certainties about a number of very basic beliefs while also acquiring further knowledge in other issues.

At the same time I am reading Francis Wheen's 'How Mumbo-Jumbo Conquered the World' which is basically an ode to rationalism. He criticizes every belief and practice that departs from the visible and scientifically provable, may it be New Age, Christianism, UFO sightings, lifestyle gurus, feng shui, acupuncture, homeopathy or post-modernism. No one is spared. I enjoy reading it despite obviously not sharing his point of view on Christianism because I really see where he's coming from. He's also a talented writer with quite a bit of sarcasm which makes the book very good and easy to follow.

A few weeks ago I also started an online course with the UN Peace Operations Training Institute and I am ploughing my way through 'An Introduction to the UN System: Orientation for Serving on a UN Field Mission'. It is primarily intended for future UN peace ops recruits, but it is also relevant for NGO workers dealing with the UN. Since we have UNAMID and UNMIS in Sudan and I will be working with an NGO here, I might as well gain some understanding of what their expectations and operational principles are.

I must say that my brain is grateful for this intellectual gymnastics.

Beside all this, I am actively preparing for E's birthday brunch on Friday morning. I finally came up with a menu (omlet, waffles, fruit salad, carrot cake) and I am ready to get everything prepared as soon as the shopping is done. I'll try and make a ball cake that E can share with Pepsi (his poney) out on the horse farm. Yeah, he wanted to celebrate his birthday with the horse, so why not? :)

About the weekend

We had a great weekend. The past tense is justified because in the Muslim world Friday is the day off, maybe if you're lucky Saturday as well, but by Sunday morning latest everybody's back to work. Unfortunately V's not among the lucky ones, so he has only one day off per week.

Thursday night we had a braai (bbq for those who have never met a South African) on our rooftop. We had the horse people, a Sudani-American entrepreneur, the pilot and the neighbours over. It was great fun as usual. The last batch left after midnight and V duly proceeded to watch the Moto GP race rerun until 4am.

Friday morning the neighbour lady invited us for breakfast, so we hung there until the kiddies nap time. The afternoon was spent loitering around the house. In the evening the neighbours (yes, the very same ones, they had an overdose of us this weekend) took us to the "Pickwick Club". It's a social club organized by the British Embassy. The security measures are stringent and we had to have our names on THE List, present a photo ID and brave a metal detector before being allowed into the inner courtyard, complete with tables, chairs, bar, bbq and a pool. We were informed that the pool was totally off limits and getting so much as our toe wet would exclude us for life. I guess this is how the British set a democratic example of freedom of expression in the political situation we are living in here. Congratulations, God save the Queen!

Today I took the kids to Ozone in the morning. It was rather good fun until E spotted the only mud patch of the garden and make his sister sit in it. We did make it home after 15 minutes spent in the ladies room trying to wash the mud off the kids. Auntie invited us over after nap and I seized the opportunity of having a cup of coffee I didn't have to prepare myself, so off we went. We got even more spoilt than expected: we were offered salad and sandwiches for supper which was absolutely fantastic.

Now here we are, ready to face another week ahead. Time just flies by so quickly here.

My blog list

On the left hand side of this page, you can see a number of websites under the title "My blog list". I chose them based on different criteria, sometimes because of their content, sometimes because of the people who write them, sometimes for both.

1. Don't Call Me a Yank(ee): This is my friend Ron's blog. As mentioned in an earlier post, I met him in Angola. He later moved to different countries until he finally ended up in the South of England near his five-year old daughter. I like reading his ramblings about Neeve, music and life in general.

2. ezazanap: This is a collection of poems and short stories written by a childhood friend of mine. We were in the same class at primary school then lost contact for 16 years, until finally facebook got us talking to each other again. He quit his important and well-paid job about a year ago in order to be able to spend his time writing and living life in a way it is worth to be lived. Obviously most of you won't be able to understand Hungarian, but I love the way his writes.

3. Making Sense of Darfur: For me this is one of the references about the situation in Darfur and Sudan in general. It is written (mainly) by Alex de Waal who is known specialist of these issues. It's great insight and the comments help to deepen the debate.

4. szudánblog: This is the diary of Hungarian aid worker based in Khartoum. I don't know who she is, but I enjoy the way she writes, even when I don't necessarily share her points of view. Again, only for Hungarian readers.

5. lifestyles of the fab and famous: This is written by my niece-in-law (if anything of the kind exists). I don't get to see much of my husband's family, since they are living so far away, therefore it is nice to get to know them (or at least one of them) a little better.

6. Sudan Watch: A general info blog about Sudan and obviously Darfur.

7. Mitch Scoggins' Weblog: I met Mitch in Madagascar where he was in charge of programmes. We are very different but had that instant connection that allowed us to work very efficiently together. (I guess the copious amounts of coffee helped as well.) He is nowadays in the States and it seems he's given up the expat lifestyle, at least for a while.

8. Travels and Stories: Another blog run by a friend of mine, met somewhere in Africa. He's always been amazingly good at writing things and making boring project descriptions come alive. You can't see that from his blog, but he's also really talented in photography and scrapbooking, and that was before scrapbooking with those curly flowers and pink paper clips became all the rage. I used to love looking at his albums.

9. The Khartoum Chronicle: An anonymous blog by an expat living in Khartoum. It seems anonymous blogs are a must here...

10. My Surrogacy Journey: I met this mom on a "moms forum" site when I was pregnant. She's got two children and decided that her own contribution towards helping others would be becoming a surrogate mother. I think that this is an amazing gift and I can't wait to read the next chapters of her adventures.

I guess I will be adding more blogs as I find them and I'll let you know why I happen to like them.

They make us laugh

E has been getting better at talking and he sometimes dishes out really hilarious replies. Here are some chosen extracts:

E: (points at the Nutella jar)
Me: (playing dumb) You want some jam?
E: (keeps pointing at Nutella jar)
Me: Or is it some butter?
E: (exasperated by such a dumb mother) Look at my finger, Maman!

V: Thank you but I don't want any cake.
E:(puzzled by such an incomprehensible decision) Is it too much for you, Papa?
V: Yes, it is.
E: Oh. Sorry about that.

V: I am missing my bike.
E: It's in your phone, Papa. (V's got the picture of the bike in his mobile phone)
V: Yeah, but that's not the same.
E: fetches his prized bike keyring) Oh, that's ok Papa. Here, have mine.

T still doesn't say much except for single words. She can name a lot of animals and she obviously understands everything we tell her. Of her own accord, she decided to call E "Buck" which we find quite funny. She calls herself "Nina". E calls her "Didi", we never managed to figure out why.

Of chairs and stamps

I've got my driving license, I've got my driving license, yaayyyy!!!

Since we are planning to be here for a while, we decided that it was better for me to get a proper Sudanese driving license. Routine checks are fairly frequent and it's better if the policemen are actually able to read my papers. We have a company pickup truck and usually V takes it to work, but it's nice for me to be able to go shopping or see friends on my own without always asking him to chauffeur me around. He's good sport and doesn't complain, but since we usually we also have to take the kids, it's a bit of a logistical nightmare.

I am no faint of heart, but we asked the company's logistics department to help us out with the formalities and what a good idea that was! First my Swiss driving license was duely translated into Arabic and certified by the University. But that was just the preliminaries.

On Day-D we showed up, V and Ali and me, at the traffic police headquarters ready to brave the Sudanese bureaucracy. Well, for about an hour after our arrival, we didn't have much to brave, since everybody was having their breakfast break, complete with ful and bread. Finally the officials started to arrive back to their desks where they sat down and stared at their black computer screens for further 15 minutes. V needed all his power of persuasion, plus some chocolate biscuits, to keep me from getting up and leaving.

In the meantime I discovered that the chairs scattered around the hall were actually placed in strategic locations. I was asked to move chairs several times, supposedly meaning that I was moving up on the waiting list ladder. Ali paid the money to someone sitting in an obscure backroom and in turn we were provided with a receipt allowing us to expect better and bigger things. I was also joined by a fellow hopeful expat working for V's company and from then on we spent our time cheering each other on. After about 90 minutes sitting in the main hall, we were herded out to the backyard and into different shady offices where we underwent an eye exam and were kitted out with further receipts and stamps.

Upon our return, we were allocated new and MUCH better chairs. I guess the eye exam is definitely a step up on the social ladder. A lady proceeded to enter my name into the computer, closely watched by two of her colleagues. My Ethiopian companion mentioned something about "job creation" at that point. Unfortunately my name was not to the lady's liking, jeopardizing our hard earned stamps and the fruitful outcome of our quest. You see, my parents were expecting a boy. When I came out obviously missing those boyish bits, they were somewhat short for name ideas. So they only gave me one first name. Now this confused the bejabers out of the veiled lady. She needed three names and I only had two. With a diplomatic incident and an IT meltdown in sight, we finally agreed that she'd put my maiden name down. Good thing I am married. What on earth would she have entered otherwise???

Another stamp, another piece of paper and I was ready to get my picture taken. If you look closely you'll be able to see the unmistakable curve of a smirk on my lips, but then you'll have to remember that we were about two and a half hours into the process at that point. Finally the holy grail (in the form of a driving license) was delivered into my hand.

It's all in Arabic, so I can't tell you what it says and I look paler than dead on the picture (and about 20 years younger than I am, according to my husband), but I've got a local license now to cruise around.

Not sure that this is a blessing. But I'll tell you about the Khartoum traffic some other day.

Ron, the Hash and the AK47

My friend Ron published a post on his blog a few days ago, inviting his readers to check out my ramblings here because I'm "doing well". Well, to return the favour (kind of...), let me tell you how I met Ron.

I was working with an NGO in Luanda at the time, young and idealistic and innocent, ya know, those kind of adjectives you just grow out of after a certain time... We were still in the middle of the civil war, stringent security measures restricting our every move and improving our chances of survival. Anyways, some not-so-innocent-anymore friends of mine talked me into attending the Hash House Harriers gatherings. Now if you've never been an expat, you've probably been spared the knowledge of what HHH stands for and you might as well remain in this blissful state of ignorance until the end of time. However, for the purpose of our little story here, I must give you some basic information.

The Hash is a regular meeting in most major cities housing a sizeable expat population. The idea is simple: the hares (usually a group of 3-4 people) set the track across town / slums / people's backyard to be followed by everybody else in a run (walk for the feeble and weak) that lasts about an hour. The physical prowess gets its reward at the end in the form of copious amounts of beer or soft drinks (again, for the feeble).

That particular day the pack was going through downtown Luanda which was a crowded and rather decayed part of town, blazing in its own bygone glory. However a lone cowboy decided that it was time to rewrite history and the expat crowd provided the perfect opportunity to finally demonstrate the superiority of the local people over this imported riffraff of assorted oil workers, UN executives and NGO do-gooders. He stood right in front of the charging hashers and pointed his AK47 at them.

Now, most people did what everybody in their right mind would do in such circumstances: disperse and keep low. Not so my friend Ron. He was the last man standing, right in front of that gun, glancing from left to right at his fellows crouching behind bushes, cars and garbage pails with that bewildered look on his face, shouting all around: "What's wrong with you, guys??? Have you never been shot at!?!?"

Erm... no. Sorry to disappoint, Ron.

So, this is how I met Ron. Nowadays he's living in the UK, being a part-time Dad to his five year old daughter. He writes a blog where he tells about his fight for his child, baseball and drinking in the UK, among other things, you can check it out here.

Dear kids...

... I am sorry for having been a crap mother today. I apologize and I know you'll forgive me. You already have. I just need to get this out of me so that the guilt doesn't linger on. I was impatient and not interested in you today. I wanted to do my own thing and it's normal to want some ME space from time to time, but it's not nice to send you away. So, I am sorry. I'll do better tomorrow. Promised. And if not, I'll apologize and you'll forgive me again and again as I am learning every day to be a better mom to you and a better person to myself and everybody else around me. It's a steep learning curve and there are many setbacks along the way, but I want them to make me rebounce and not recoil with guilt and feelings of failure.

So tomorrow morning, I'll be there on the front line again, ready to face another day with you.

I love you.

The greener grass effect

"What if I had...?" This is probably the most frequent question people ask themselves. It questions our past choices, builds different scenarios for our present and wonders how our future would be different - usually better - had we decided otherwise. What if I had studied something else? What if I had taken another job? What if I had married somebody else? What if I did / didn't have kids? What if I had moved someplace else? The answers are invariably: I would be happier, richer, more important, more powerful, more beautiful, more relaxed, less stressed and the list goes on.

I've been there, done that and I am not sure I've got the t-shirt just yet. Questions do come back to me on a regular basis. What am I doing here? Can I undo what's been done? Any way to escape from the consequences or change the outcome? Don't get me wrong, I love my life and as I said in an earlier post, I finally feel at peace with where I am and what I'm doing. But still, questions pop up and my brain goes into a frenzy of building castles in the air that vanish as soon as the wind of reality hits them.

The other day I came across a text in the Bible. It's Psalm 16. "Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance."

Now doesn't this define the colour of my grass? :-)



PS: És mindebbõl a tanulság? Talán mégis csak a Hufnáger Pistihez kellett volna feleségül mennem??? ;-))))

Shopping local

I went shopping this afternoon to the "best" supermarket in town. Even the smallest Migros (Swiss supermarket chain) would make it blush in comparison, but hey, you take what you can get, right?

Here is what I paid in Sudanese pounds:

2 kg cat food: 90
Tabasco: 8.50
4 pots of yogurt: 4
Green beans: 6
Grated mozzarella 250g: 9.30
2l milk: 8
1l yogurt drink: 3.50
Banana: 1.60
Grapes: 10.90
Bell peppers: 4.10
Apples: 8.45
Lemons: 1
Candy bar: 4
Kiwis: 9
Kellogg's Fruit'n'Fibre: 19.50
Marmite: 20
Olive oil 750ml: 17.50
Seran wrap: 5
Ariel 4kg: 40
Grape juice: 7
Berry juice: 7
Butter 450g: 10
Herbal tea: 5
2 l tomato juice: 13
2 l apple juice: 13
Plastic cups: 30

That's 355.35 SDG in total.

Or 178 Swiss franks.

In Switzerland, it would have cost me about 140 Swiss franks (based on www.leshop.ch, known to be rather more expensive than buying the stuff in a normal supermarket)

That's almost 30% more.

Don't come and tell me that Switzerland is expensive.